Eight days

My insides ached. My heart broke for her; for all the family. God must have been holding me a little tighter the night I heard what was going on. I went directly to my husband, who was talking with my youngest brother, and relayed the news. We instantly sought our Faithful Savior in prayer and in the end His will was done. It had to be done; for the sovereign, Holy, and mystifying reasons of God.

My cousin Sarah Arlene Garcia and her husband Miguel have both served our country in the Army. Miguel is still serving and is currently in Iraq as I type. He had arrived back in the States from Iraq on the 8th of February, anxiously awaiting the first time to hear his daughter's heartbeat. Sarah had a beautiful, healthy, normal pregnancy...until that day. On February 9th, she along with Miguel and her mother Marsha went in for her 39th week check up. Precious Hailey’s heartbeat could not be found. I was not aware of the situation until late in her labor and late at night. I can only imagine what was going on at the hospital…prayers, tears, hugs, and an onslaught of emotions. Sweet, innocent, fearfully and wonderfully made Hailey was delivered at 1:06AM, on February, 10th, 2010; her due date. Her perfectly created body was born, but her young spirit had already gone on home...leaving a father's ears forever unfulfilled.

Hailey Arlene was laid to rest on February, 13th, 2010. Every good and perfect gift comes from above. It was unreal to be there…two infant funerals eight days apart. God is still good!

In the weeks to follow Sarah and I shared our stories, pictures, and love for each other and our daughters. When Sarah and I got together for the first time. I was telling her how I knew God has already used this for good. I said, "If we both had our little girls, we wouldn't be here together today. We would be living our own lives and doing our own things." Sarah said, "Yeah, we would just be doing what we always did. Never talking to each other." God knew this was going to happen. It was no shock to Him. Our relationship is only the beginning of the good God is making from our losses.

We have experienced the same loss, but they are so drastically different. I got to come home and be a mom. Don't misunderstand me! Sarah is a mother! A mother full of love for her child! A mother that had plans for her daughter! A mother that cared for her baby's needs the ENTIRE time she was alive! But I had Alivia at home. I could still "act out" being a mom. I could still change diapers, wipe runny noses, and kiss boo-boos. I still ache for her. I love you Sarah! I can only imagine..."I am a mother, but I don't have anyone to mother." she told me. I won't begin to act like I know that side of your pain. I don't. But, God is good. Hailey and Helen are growing up together. They, along with all the other lost babies, will be toddling on streets of gold! Streets of gold people! God knew that Helen needed a playmate and He gave a gorgeous one! Thanks for "meeting" Hailey Arlene! And thank you, Sarah for letting me share your precious daughter with everyone!

I have more to share. More healing is to come, along with more tears.
But...we know that ALL things work together for good to them who love God, to them who are the called, according to His purposes. ~Romans 8:28.

Blessings,
Jordan